Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Don't Talk To Strangers And Other Good Advice Your Mom Gave You

Wes is such a good-hearted person.  He always wants to believe the best in people and occasionally it gets him into trouble.  Like the other day...

Wes:  Hey, did I tell you the other day I saw a guy walking on the interstate with a gas can?

Me:  (already wary)  Oh?

Wes:  Yes, he was such a decent-looking guy, well-dressed, kinda reminded me of my dad.

Me:  (knowing where this going) Hmmm.

Wes:  So I --

Me: (interrupting) Tell me you didn't stop and talk to him.

Wes:  Well...I pulled over to ask him...and uh...uh, you know... his car was probably just a little ways down the road, and uh...

Me:  You gave him a ride, didn't you?

Wes: (sheepishly) ....Yeah.

So at this point I'm thinking that, while it was really an unwise thing to do, I understand that Wes tends to run out of gas quite often and would therefore have sympathy for a fellow-traveler.

Wes: (tone becomes indignant) And would you believe that when I asked how far it was to his car he said, "Oh, I don't have a car.  I got a DUI and can't drive.   I just carry this gas can so people will stop and pick me up."

Me:  (Silent but with that I-told-you-that-you-can't-just-go-around-giving-random-strangers-the-benefit-of-the-doubt look on my face)

Wes:  (feeling the need to fill in the silence)  He was going to Hot the races.

Me:  (more silence and stern looks)

Wes:  Um, he said you wouldn't believe how many people fall for the gas can thing.  He said he could get to Hot Springs and back in a day.

Me: (refusing to be impressed by the potential serial killer's travel ingenuity)  Have you not seen enough episodes of Criminal Minds and CSI?!?!?!

Wes: (defensively) Well, he looked really nice!

Me:  Ted Bundy was nice-looking too.

Wes:  Um, so anyway,  I told him he really pulled one over on me and then I drove about 85 mph to the next exit and dropped him off.

(About 5 minutes passes in silence with Wes happily thinking the subject has been dropped.)


Wes:  Well, I really kept my eye on him.

Me:  Oh, good.  So you would have seen him pull a gun and shoot you between the eyes.

Wes: (knowing when it's best to just give up) Yep.


Charlotte said...

I'm pretty sure I saw this guy. When I passed I thought...if I were a guy I would help him, but bad idea for a girl. I wondered how far he had to walk and looked for his car ahead....never saw it. It crossed my mind that he was trying to scam some kind-hearted soul.

Wes said...

Thank you very much Charlotte! Lisa, he also told me a good place to fish on Lake Bodcaw and that his gas can doubled as a suitcase that could hold a 12 pack of beer!! Or in your CSI mind..a gun.

Kendra said...

You are lucky you are alive!

Amber said...


That story is never going to get old. Promise me that you will tell it to everyone that you meet when I'm with you, just so I can hear it again!!!

Carpool Queen said...

I can't believe he copped to it!

Jennifer said...

Don't worry Mistah Wesh...Danny said he knows someone else that has picked this guy up before!!

Apparently he's harmless...just has a gambling problem!!

Glad you didn't get shot between the eyes!!

Tiffani said...

Oh my goodness!!

I kept waiting for Wes to say he'd like led him to Jesus on the side of highway or something!!!!

Sheesh! Just glad Wes is safe and the guy isn't a CSI episode in the making!

Anonymous said...

Sorry. I'm late to the party. In Wes's defense, I would have fallen for it. I wouldn't have stopped because I'm a girl and my dad taught me better. But I probably would have told Kelly to stop if we were together. Who would think someone that stupid would be able to come up with something that clever? I am aghast. (At least I think that's what I am if that word means what I think it does.)