Monday, April 27, 2009

Monday Miscellany

Friday night I went on a much-needed Girls' Night Out with some of the girls from church: Amber , Stephanie, Jennifer, Teresa, Mona and Sarah. Word to the wise--if you want to have time to go to Hobby Lobby's 1/2 price scrapbook supplies sale, don't eat at Chili's. SLOW, VERY SLOW.

Since Hobby Lobby was closed by the time we finished eating, and this sad fact resulted in much wailing and gnashing of teeth, there was only one course of action that would console my heart...


By the time we were done, we were all feeling pretty sassy and vowed that next Girls' Night Out we would get tattoos.

Oh, I kid!

Not really.

Maybe a teeny tiny one?!

Or a nose ring.

If you knew us, you would be rolling on the floor right now laughing at the preposterous-ness (is that a word? It is now.) of the very idea!

After the luxury of all things pedicure-related, we headed to Books-A-Million since it was the only thing still open. Yeah, they roll the sidewalks up at 9:00 pm around here. We browsed the bargain books, purchased chocolate caramel lattes and discussed politics, education, and current events. Lest you think we are dull, I'll just say that the conversation took a turn that resulted in much giggling and out-right guffawing. And there may or may not have been a high-five involved. *grin*

Today, I am attempting to purge some drawers and closets for the upcoming garage sale. *sigh* You may remember I already did this once last fall. How is it that I still have so much stuff I can live without? Why do I have these things?!

Also, just to follow up on an urgent matter. Do you remember I asked if any of you had used this?

Well, I finally found one and I LOVE IT!!!

I know you have all been on pins and needles wanting to know my opinion of the Pet Hair Sweeper. Now you can rest easy.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Freedom Friday 4.24.09

Welcome to Freedom Friday! Oh, and this is my 100th post so "Happy 100 to me!"

If you're new here and want to know more about how Freedom Friday got started, read this post. If you're concerned about the Freedom Friday logo, I explain it here.

Today's principle is: It is not un-American for me to disagree with authority or to share my personal opinion.

“In a free and republican government, you cannot restrain the voice of the multitude; every man will speak as he thinks, or more properly without thinking.”
- George Washington

As a side note, in the quote above by George Washington, the word "republican" does NOT mean Republican party. Contrary to popular belief, our country is NOT a democracy but a republic. A republic is a form of government based on the concept that sovereignty resides in the people, who delegate the power to rule in their behalf to elected representatives and officials. A democracy is government by the people, especially rule of the majority.

Today the terms are used interchangeably but to our founding fathers there was an important distinction. In the 18th century democracy was normally understood in its original Greek sense of direct rule by the entire populace. The idea was that all the voters would meet regularly to make laws and debate issues. The founders recognized that eventually that would result in mob rule so they established a republic which would still leave ulimate power in the hands of the people but permit efficiency of government through elected representatives.

Are you bored yet? Sorry I went off on a tangent there. But don't you feel informed now?!

Back to today's principle.

I think that this principle and its violation is best understood by looking at Janeane Garafolo's view of dissent: then and now.

Janeane Garafolo in September, 2003 defending anti-American remarks by Johnny Depp:

"There has been so many inappropriate responses to dissent, which is the most patriotic thing you can do. And the First Amendment guarantees everyone's right to speak out. The pillorying that was endured by the Dixie Chicks and Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins and now Johnny Depp is absurd. And, again, it is promulgated by the kind of Archie Bunker mentality that dominates the right wing of the Republican Party and also right-wing radio and some of the faux populist right-wing cable news shows."

Ok. So dissent, when a Republican is president, is patriotic.

Janeane Garafolo in 2009 when asked about the Tax Day Tea Parties held around the country on April 15th:

"Let's be very honest about what this is about. This is not about bashing Democrats. It's not about taxes. They have no idea what the Boston Tea party was about. They don't know their history at all. It's about hating a black man in the White House. This is racism straight up...The limbic brain inside a rightwinger or Republican or conservative or your average white power activist is much larger in their head space than in a reasonable person and its pushing against the frontal lobe so their synapsis are misfiring."

But dissent, when Obama is president, is racist and a result of a brain disorder.


The truth is while I whole-heartedly disagreed with Johnny Depp's anti-American comments, he has EVERY RIGHT to state his opinion and I do not consider him un-American. But by that same token, I and everyone else who attended those tea parties have EVERY RIGHT to protest outrageous government spending.

Janeane Garofalo also has every right to be stupid.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Misplacing God (and finding Him again) by Joanne Heim

I am so excited to review Joanne Heim's newest book, Misplacing God (and finding Him again). I am a regular reader of Joanne's blog and often refer to her as "my friend, Joanne" even though I've never met her in person. We share a mutual real life friend so hopefully that's not as weird as it sounds! Joanne is so honest and open in her writing and it just makes you feel like you know her. She's just lovely!

So on to my review...

This book takes an honest look at how we struggle to fit God into our busy, daily lives. We may have the desire to spend quality time with our Heavenly Father but actually making the time is often a different story. Author Joanne Heim shares her own experience of misplacing God and her discovery of how making Him a priority changed her life. She offers insight into what spending time with God looks like and why it's good for us. She gives practical advice ranging from creating a sacred space to having flexibility in scheduling. She also walks the reader through several ways to study the bible including the inductive bible study method and also gives helpful information on how to pray. Joanne provides encouragement to persevere and shares her personal story of what motivates her passion for spending time with God. At the end of the book Joanne lists numerous resources that she has found helpful in her journey of quiet time. If you are struggling with having a quiet time, I recommend Misplacing God as an excellent resource.

Great job, Joanne!

I'm Melting! Melting!

Happy Earth Day!


(If you're new here then you probably don't hear my voice dripping with sarcasm right now.)

It's not that I don't believe in global warming. I just disagree that "the debate is settled." There are laws in Newton's law of gravity or Archimedes' Principal. And there are evolution, Big Bang global warming. There are reputable scientists that disagree with the theory of man-made global warming and credible studies that show global warming is part of a natural cycle or related to solar activity. Is it that far-fetched to think that the Earth's warming is somehow related to that big ball of fire in the sky? Or does it seem more likely that a naturally-occuring compound that trees need to grow is somehow toxic to the Earth? I don't know, maybe it's just me but I'm just sayin'...

I think I'll agree with John Coleman, founder of the Weather Channel, who said the man-made global warming myth is "the greatest scam in history." Cap and trade and carbon credits are just another form of taxation. But that's just me.

You know, I used to recycle and try to conserve energy. But the global warming hysteria has given conservation such a bad name I don't want anything to do with it. I mean, I'm all for stewardship of God's creation and I don't think dumping toxic waste in rivers is a good idea. But I don't want to be mistaken for a green-loving, tree-hugging, fear-mongering global warming alarmist.

So, I'm celebrating Earth Day by driving a few extra miles in my gas-guzzling SUV and crankin' the a/c down to 67 degrees.

I may even kill a polar bear.

Oh, I kid! I don't need PETA on my case.

My 8 year-old told me that Nickelodeon is running an Earth Day ad telling kids to turn off all the lights and not watch TV today.

I asked her, "So, what does that mean we're going to do?"

She answered, with a sly grin, "Turn on every. single. light. and watch tv ALL day!"

Indoctrination complete.

In other news, I finally broke down and got my hair colored for the first time. It's like admitting I'm getting old.

Sorry the picture is a little blurry. I took it of myself and had trouble with the auto-focus.

Hey, just think of all the chemicals that were used on my hair that are now in the water system.


Monday, April 20, 2009

In Which I Brag on Myself

Look-ee what I did! See that fabric cornice board? I made that-with styrofoam! I found some instructions for a lightweight cornice board here. But the thing I'm most proud of is...

See those ecru panels?

Canvas painter's drop cloths.


Got them at for $7.53 a piece. They are 4' by 12' and already finished at the edges. They have a really great weight and texture. All I had to do was cut off the top to the desired length and sew a simple rod pocket. Ta-da!

Bottom line...I paid $1.88 per yard for my drapes. Ha!, I laugh at your $6.98 per yard canvas!

Please excuse the chair that does not match. It is due to be re-covered.

In other news...

I walked in the other day and my 8-year old had lined up in the butler's pantry all of her Webkinz that need to be repaired due to the Beast that runs our house and destroys all things near and dear to us, a.k.a Tess the Sheltie.

I said, "Whatcha doin'?"

She said, in her most serious voice, "THIS is the infirmary."

I just love that she knows words like 'infirmary' and uses them when I least expect it.

Here are the patients:

I'm not sure the one missing his entire face in going to make it.

I don't think he has health insurance.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Face of Betrayal by Lis Wiehl with April Henry


Face of Betrayal by Lis Wiehl with April Henry is a good, solid mystery and a quick read. The main characters are three life-long friends who call themselves the Triple Threat. Cassidy is a reporter, Allison is a prosecuting attorney and Nicole is an FBI agent. Unfortunately, it’s very reminiscent of James Patterson’s Women’s Murder Club series and doesn’t hold up by comparison. The plot line was also reminiscent of the Gary Condit/Chandra Levy case and therefore felt a little predictable. I felt like the characters weren’t fully developed and seemed more like strangers to each other even though they are supposed to be life-long friends. I also felt like there were way too many issues or themes introduced that weren’t fully developed: online predators, infertility, pregnancy, domestic abuse, stalkers, etc. They weren’t integral to the plot necessarily so I felt like they either should have been left out completely or dealt with more extensively through the story line. As it is, it felt like they were briefly mentioned and then neatly tied up and the book moved on. I do appreciate Lis’ expertise in law, politics and criminal investigation which lend the plot an air of authenticity. Overall, an interesting read even if I wouldn’t call it a thriller.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Freedom Friday 04.17.09

Welcome to Freedom Friday! If you're new here, you can go to this post to find out who inspired Freedom Friday.

Today's principle is:

I work hard for what I have and I will share it with who I want to. Government cannot force me to be charitable.

The timing of this one could not have been any better since we just "celebrated" Tax Day on April 15th. I don't know about you but I've never felt charitable on April 15th.

Conveniently, I've already discussed this one a little in this post so click on over there so I don't have to reinvent the wheel.

Now I'd like to tell you about the April 15 Tax Day Tea Party I attended with my family. The main stream media would have you believe that these protests (which were held all over the country) were about high taxes. They would also have you believe that the people who attended these parties are Anti-Obama, Republican, crazy, racist, hate-mongering, right-wing extremists. Nothing could be farther from the truth.

The parties were actually about out-of-control government spending. Of course, the enormous spending of today will inevitably result in higher taxes tomorrow. So I guess the parties were indirectly about taxes. And they weren't necessarily anti-Obama. George W. started this outrageous spending. The Republicans are as much to blame as the Democrats.

As for the kinds of people who attended the parties...imagine Mayberry meets Leave It To Beaver meets Dukes of Hazzard. There were grandparents, families with small children, teens, college students, good 'ol boys, small business owners, retirees, veterans...people from all walks of life. And they were so nice and friendly! I heard "Oh, I'm so sorry, is my sign in your way?" and "Oh dear, who do these sunglasses belong to?" and "Let's be sure to pick up our trash." In fact, my dad said, "Conservatives really don't know how to throw a protest, do they? Shouldn't we be burning something?!" There was fun music and for cryin' out loud, an ice cream truck! I was so proud to be able to show my kids that THIS is how change happens in America. We don't have coup d'etats or violent revolutions. Praise God, we have the right to assembly and peaceful protest!

The Tea Parties were about connecting with like-minded individuals and having our voice heard. And a good time was had by all!

Here are a few pics:

This Ain't New York had a great post about her experience. Very eloquent!

Big Mama had a hilarious post about her husband's adventure at the San Antonio Tea Party.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Something's Brewing and It Isn't Earl Grey

So the family and I went to the Tax Day Tea Party at the State Capitol yesterday. I plan to blog about it tomorrow for Freedom Friday but thought I'd share a couple of things to whet your appetite.

First, it was so fun to read all the signs that people had made. Some clever, some not, and a few just baffling. This one made me giggle every time I glanced at it. See the white one that reads "HELP! My gov't is robbing me!"

Every time I glanced at it my brain registered it as "HELP! My gout is killing me!" And I kept picturing a little old person that had taken a wrong turn and thought they were protesting in front of the nursing home.

Yeah, I'm that easily amused.

I turned over my camera to my 8 year-old to keep her entertained and it quickly evolved into a supermodel photo shoot starring her sister which resulted in the pictures like the following:

I also got a lot of pictures of the sky, the ground, and very surprised motorists driving in the other lane beside us on the interstate. And of course...

The all-important Ice Cream Truck with the irritating jingle. Shameless capitalist! He knew he had a captive audience of parents desperate to pacify their children. Good job, Ice Cream Guy!

More tomorrow. I must go to bed.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

You're Invited

I'd like to invite you to a tea party...

No, silly! Not THAT kind of tea party!

THIS kind of tea party...

I've reassured my 8-year old that she won't really have to drink any tea. She was very relieved although quite disappointed that there won't be any cookies either. I'm also fairly certain there won't be any 18th century ships either. And I'm pretty sure we won't really be dumping crates of tea into the river.

What we WILL be doing is protesting out-of-control government spending. The main stream media would have you believe that tomorrow's Tax Day Tea Parties, which are being held all over the country, are simply about taxes. They argue that the tax rates now are the same as they were under Ronald Reagan. While that may be true right now, how do you suppose we are going to pay for all this outrageous spending that Washington is doing right now? Or rather, how do you suppose our children will pay for this outrageous spending? Yep. That's right. Higher taxes. Stifling, oppressive taxes. Our current spending amounts to fiscal child abuse!

So if you're going to be in the Little Rock area tomorrow afternoon come join my family from 3:45 pm - 6:00 pm at the Capitol.

We'll party like it's 1773!

Update to add: We will also be collecting canned goods and non-perishable items for the Arkansas FoodBank Network.


Canned meats/fish/poultry
Canned/Packaged Meals
Peanut Butter
Canned Vegetables
Canned Fruits
100% Juices
Pasta and Pasta Sauces

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Resurrection Day

On Easters' past, I have celebrated my Risen Lord's sacrifice for me and for you so that we could be reconciled to God and have eternal life. But this Easter, I'm really, REALLY celebrating Jesus' conquering of the grave. You see, this Easter is different from all the other Easters before it. THIS Easter, my beautiful niece Hannah is celebrating Easter face to face with Jesus. What must that be like?

I don't think I've ever really wondered before how Jesus celebrates Easter. I'll bet there's lots of laughing, singing and dancing! I've also never really spent a lot of time wondering what Heaven is like. It was always in the back of my mind but always seemed so far away. I knew it was good, and that Jesus is there and I'm going there someday to be with Him and that was enough. But in the nearly 2 months since Hannah left us, my kids and I have talked a lot about Heaven. And the more people I love that go there before me, the more it just feels like HOME.

The most exciting part of the whole Easter story though is not just that Jesus rose from the dead. That's exciting but He didn't do it JUST so we could go to Heaven...He's got BIG plans! You see, my Jesus is coming back for me and you and when He does this earth will never be the same!

The Bible gives us this to look foward to in Revelation 21:

1 Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. 2 I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. 3 And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. 4 He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

5 He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”

6 He said to me: “It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To him who is thirsty I will give to drink without cost from the spring of the water of life. 7 He who overcomes will inherit all this, and I will be his God and he will be my son.

I love a happy ending, how about you?

If you don't know my Savior I'd love to introduce you.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Christianity in Crisis: 21st Century

A book review for Thomas Nelson Publishing.

Hank Hanegraaff is the host of Bible Answer Man, a radio program heard daily throughout the US and Canada. He is president of the Christian Research Institute and author of several books. In Christianity In Crisis: 21st Century, Mr. Hanegraaff takes on the Faith movement or prosperity gospel. He rails against so-called prosperity preachers including Joyce Meyer, Joel Osteen and T.D. Jakes. While I am certainly no fan of any of these people, I found Mr. Hanegraaff’s attacks to be almost of a personal nature rather than doctrinal. While I am uneasy with the likes of Joel Osteen and Joyce Meyer, I also found myself uneasy with Mr. Hanegraaff. After googling him, I found that he is himself a very controversial figure having been sued several times and accused of plagiarism, unethical behavior and financial fraud. While I don’t put much credence into anything found on the Internet, these findings did somewhat confirm my uneasiness about blindly accepting Mr. Hanegraaff’s assessment of these prosperity preachers. In fact, I can’t even determine that he has any formal education in theology. He offers supposed examples of the Faith preachers’ heresy, complete with numerous footnotes, but I found his book to be redundant with repetitive use of the same few examples. He employs extensive use of mnemonic devices which I found to be a little hokey and largely unnecessary. Please read this book with a healthy dose of skepticism and do some research on your own of all the players mentioned.

Pantry Pickle

Have I told you how sad my pantry makes me?

Please don't look at it too long or you too could become overwhelmed by despair.

Yes, the shelves are unpainted. That's another one of those things that we were going to finish after we moved in...three years ago.

Yes, those are grease stains on the unpainted shelf from various "nutritious" snacks that my kids (or husband) spilled onto said shelf and left there. But really, if you spilled something in here would you feel compelled to clean it up either? I mean, it's OBVIOUSLY so well-cared for!

There's the bread-maker that I thought I had to have and haven't used in years. There's the cupcake maker that Caitlin had to have for Christmas that hasn't been used since. There's also a can of chickpeas. Why?

Yes there are three identical bags of cereal. For some reason, once there is a new bag of cereal my kids refuse to finish the current bag, even if they are the same kind so I have to time my cereal purchases very carefully. Guess I've fallen off that wagon.

Oh, and I hate that wire shelf thingy. It's functional but soooo ugly. Any ideas?

See those pretty glass canisters with the stainless steel lids? I heart those. Got 'em at Hobby Lobby for $3-4 a piece. I taped the cooking instructions to the bottom of each canister. I've got one for spaghetti, one for rice, and one for instant mashed potato flakes which is a staple at our house. I haven't decided what to put in the fourth one. They look out of place in that dismal hole I call a pantry.

I'm thinking of painting the walls and shelves a fun color. Any suggestions on some other ways to beautify and organize my nemesis?

Friday, April 10, 2009

Ten Places I Want to Visit

My friend Mer was kind enough to send me the code for her cute clickable button for her Ten on the Tenth Linky but unfortunately I have no idea how to insert it in my blog post. I know how to add it as a gadget on the sidebar but I want it IN this post. Anyone know how to do that in Blogger?

Since I am inept with html code, I will just insert a picture of her button.

Ta Da!

Okey Dokey, here's my list of ten places I would LOVE to visit in no particular order:

10. Maui

9. Isle of Capri, Italy

8. Bermuda

7. Costa Rica

6. Stonehenge

5. Scotland

4. Ireland

3. Egypt

2. Israel

1. Washington, D.C.

Have a blessed Easter!

Freedom Friday 04.10.09

Welcome to Freedom Friday!

Today's principal is : I have a right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness, but there is no guarantee of equal results.

“Everyone has a natural right to choose that vocation in life which he thinks most likely to give him comfortable subsistence.” -Thomas Jefferson

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness." -United States Declaration of Independence

The key to understanding how our government and society were designed to work is to recognize that while "all Men are created equal" we were never guaranteed equal results. Ideally, our government provides the framework for us to operate in and then gets out of the way, leaving us to our Lives, Liberties and pursuits of Happiness. What I decide to pursue may differ significantly from what you decide to pursue. The things that make me happy are not necessarily the things that make you happy. I may be ultimately more successful in my pursuits than you are or vice versa. And that's okay.

What matters is that you and I have equal opportunity.

What we make of that opportunity is up to us.

Meet Chris Gardner, the man whose rags-to-riches story inspired the movie Pursuit of Happyness starring Will Smith. Chris did not have any positive male role models as a child, since his father was absent and his stepfather was a violent man who physically abused him and his mother regularly. Despite her unhappy marriage, Gardner's mother, Bettye Jean Triplett, was a source of inspiration and strength. She encouraged Gardner to believe in himself and sowed the seeds of self-reliance in him. Gardner quotes her as saying, "You can only depend on yourself. The cavalry ain't coming."

Bettye was imprisoned and Chris and his siblings sent to live in foster care when his stepfather reported her for working while receiving welfare. They re-entered foster care when she later tried to burn down the family home with the stepfather inside. From those experiences, Chris determined that alcoholism, domestic abuse, child abuse, illiteracy, fear, and powerlessness were all things he wanted to avoid in the future.

Long story short, Chris kept trying to work his way out of poverty and powerlessness and kept getting knocked down. Gardner eventually worked to become a top trainee at Dean Witter Reynolds. He arrived at the office early and stayed late each day, persistently making calls to prospective clients with his goal being 200 calls/day. His perseverance paid off when, in 1982, Gardner passed his licensing exam on the first try and became a full employee of the firm. He still barely made enough to support himself and then after a failed relationship, he found himself with sole custody of his infant son. The rooming house he lived in didn't allow children and so Chris and his son secretly struggled with homelessness while he saved money for a rental house.

This is just a glimpse into the trials and tragedies of Chris' life. But the good news is that Chris never gave up. He persevered and in the end his hard work was rewarded when he founded his own brokerage firm.

Today, Chris is wealthy beyond his wildest dreams and he uses his influence and wealth to fund many charitable organizations some of which provided assistance to Chris and his son many years before. Now I'm not suggesting that hard work and perseverence will always result in wealth; nor am I suggesting that wealth for wealth's sake should be our goal. I simply offer Chris' humble rags-to-riches story as an example of how we can overcome our circumstances through perseverance and we can use our stories of struggle and success to inspire and encourage others to do the same.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Funniest Movie Line Ever

My friend Kendra sent me this link and I thought it was rather amusing so enjoy!

Friday, April 3, 2009

Freedom Friday 04.03.09

Welcome to Freedom Friday where we discuss the founding principles of America.

Today's principle is: If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it.

“I deem one of the essential principles of our government… equal and exact justice to all men of whatever state or persuasion, religious or political.” Thomas Jefferson

It seems like these days there are exceptions for everything. If you are rich enough, powerful enough or smart enough then you can get away with just about anything. If you have the right political connections or if you are 'too big to fail' then you get a pass.

Justice no longer exists in our society. Everything is relative. There is no absolute truth anymore. When did truth become a moving target?

John Adams said about our nation, "They define a republic to be a government of laws, and not of men." How far we have strayed.

I know the AIG bonuses are terribly unpopular. However, they were part of a legally binding contracts. Congress has NO RIGHT to break those contracts regardless of public sentiment. You could argue that the contracts should not have been agreed upon; that's a different argument. The TRUTH is the contracts were knowingly, willingly and legally entered into and must be honored.

Tim "TurboTax" Geithner is another great example. He knowingly signed documents acknowledging that his income was taxable and yet deliberately chose to omit it from his tax returns. If you or I did that we would go to jail for tax evasion. However, Congress and our President would have us believe that Mr. Geithner is so smart and the economy is so bad that we NEED him so we'll just have to overlook the fact that he cheated on his taxes and PUT HIM IN CHARGE OF THE IRS AND ENFORCING THE TAX CODE.

Let's get back to standing firm for truth and justice regardless of whether or not it makes us popular. Let's do the right thing.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

I Don't Know Why I Feel Compelled to Share This

Our family has a weird thing that we do.

Each member of our family has a cartoon voice that we use to have conversations with each other on behalf of our pets.

For example, when I come in the house I'll see Tess, the Sheltie, and I'll say "Hey, Tess!" and Hayley or Caitlin will respond in a high-pitched baby voice "Hey, Momma! I'm glad you're home!" as though Tess was answering my greeting.

But that's not the weird thing I'm talking about.

We give each of our pets theme songs.


Each pet has a distinctive personality or characteristic. When listening to the radio, if we hear a line in a song that reminds us of that characteristic we'll say "That's _____ song!" Fill in the blank with the pet's name.

I'll give you some examples.

Max, the Jersey Wooley rabbit, may he rest in peace, looked like a Brillo pad. So, do you remember the line in "Cha-Cha Slide" that goes "Fonky...fonky...fonky?" Max's hair was fonky and therefore, "Cha-Cha Slide" became his song.

Shelby, the Sheltie, may she rest in peace, had Alzheimers and pretty much had to be carried everywhere there towards the end. But when we picked her up she always looked confused like she thought she was levitating so her song became "I Believe I Can Fly."

Maddie, the German Shepherd, is a Type-A, anal-retentive type. She loves to fetch but refuses to give the thrown item back. She will stand just out of reach. So her song is "Can't Touch This."

So, imagine my concern when we were in the car one day and Britney Spears' song "Womanizer" came on and both my girls squealed...

"That's Daddy's song!!!"

Beg your pardon?

You'll be relieved to know, as I was, that "Womanizer" is Daddy's song because he likes to make fun of Britney's synthesized, electronic voice.