The Post I've Put Off Long Enough

I've written this post a million times in my head but I can never seem to get the right words to come out when I start typing.  Here it is, the middle of January already, and the rest of the world seems to be truckin' right along and here I am, still stuck reflecting on 2009.  I had this grand idea that I would write a clever New Year's post.  It would be witty and enlightening.  It would inspire you, my faithful readers, and move you to tears.

Not so much.

So I've decided to just keep it real and tell you what's been on my heart.

2009 was not kind to me.  I am very glad to see it slink off into the past where it belongs.  It was a year in which everything I thought I knew was shattered into a thousand little, jagged pieces.  I'll be picking up those pieces one by one for a very long time.

2009 was the year in which I lost my faith in God but found it again or at least something that faintly resembles it.  This was the year that I questioned everything I had ever been taught about God and everything I thought I believed to be true about God.  2009 was the year I decided that prayer didn't matter and yet I couldn't stop praying.  It was the year that I believed that it might all be some horrible joke and there really is no God and yet I couldn't quite quit believing.

2009 was the year that everything I thought I knew about parenting turned out to be woefully inadequate.

2009 was the year that I no longer recognized the country that I live in.  The America I thought I knew didn't exist anymore.

2009 was the year that people I trusted, that I called Friends, betrayed my trust in a painful and shocking way.  It was a year in which I would question every relationship I had and everyone I thought I knew.  It was the year that I learned the hard way to be guarded with people for fear that while they were smiling at me they were plunging a knife into my back.

2009 was the year every belief I ever held about anything of substance was challenged.

2009 was the first year I have ever been fearful of the coming of the New Year and what it might hold.

And yet...

It was a year that I learned more about myself than I really wanted to know.  It was a time of painful pruning by the Gardener.  Indeed, my branches still hurt.  But I think I'm starting to see some little green shoots of new growth.  There may not be any buds yet but they're in there.  They'll bloom in time.

And I'll be grateful for the lessons of 2009.

But not today.  Today I'm just glad it's in the rear-view mirror.

Answering Life's Questions One Blog Post At A Time

My bestie Amber over at Raising Rascals posed a question at the end of her post today that may well be one of the most important questions of our time.  After much pondering of the enormity of the question before me and much thoughtful consideration and careful study, I believe I can answer said question.


The question posed by the infamous Rascal Raiser was this:

If you were forced to transform into a toy for the rest of your life, which toy would you be?  Why?


My immediate thought was "Why, Malibu Barbie, of course!"


Who wouldn't want to be unrealistically, perfectly beautiful and live in a Dream House and drive a cool pink convertible?  But then I thought, "Do I really want to try to maintain perfection the rest of my life?"


Nah.  And let's face it, Ken is just way to metrosexual for my taste.  Now G.I. Joe, there's a manly man!


So then I thought, "Mrs. Potato Head.  That's it!"  She doesn't have to worry about her figure because, hello, SHE'S A POTATO!"  And when Mr. Potato Head gets on her nerves she can don her angry eyes and rip his lips off.


Ok, so maybe that's a little too violent.


And then it hit me...


I'd be a Slinky!





What could be better than that?!  No one really expects too much out of a Slinky.  It does one thing and does it really well so there's no pressure.  AND someone always carries it UPSTAIRS and it only has to go DOWN by itself and even then it just has to let gravity do its thing.


It's the ultimate in laziness.


I love it.


And now you have that obnoxious song stuck in your head.


You're welcome.

Christmas Eve Thoughts

This Christmas Eve I am not quite sure what to feel.  I adore the Christmas season.  I love the hustle and bustle, the music, the special time with family and friends and the traditions.

But this year our traditions are different.  They will never be the same.  You see, this is Hannah's first Christmas in Heaven.  Our first Christmas with a huge, jagged hole in our hearts.  This is the first year that we are missing a key singer in our family's rendition of Twelve Days of Christmas as we take turns belting out the verses and laughing at Brad's out-of-tune but full of gusto "Five Goooolden Rings!"  This is the first year that the cousins are missing their Director as they perform the Christmas Story complete with dogs playing the part of sheep and Caitlin as Baby Jesus.  

So while I enjoy the Season and the precious time with my husband and children, there's a part of me that feels guilty.  For I know that there is a family, who is also my family, that is missing their beautiful daughter and sister this Season.  So while I take great pleasure in the time spent with my family, my heart still hurts for them.  My heart hurts for my husband, kids and myself too because we also miss her.  But our hurt cannot possibly compare with theirs.

I know that Hannah is with Jesus and I can't even imagine what the Celebration is like in Heaven this time of year!  I'm grateful for Jesus' birth because I know it makes the hope we have possible.  Hope that we too someday will celebrate Christmas in the very presence of Jesus.  And with Hannah.

So, this Season I am all too aware that life is fragile and we are not guaranteed tomorrow.  I plan to make the most of this time and savor every precious moment.  I covet your prayers for our family over the next few joyful but painful and difficult days.  I also ask you to join me as I pray for dear friends who are also experiencing their first Christmases without their dads and friends who have loved ones with serious illnesses.

I hope you all have a Blessed Christmas and create some beautiful memories!  I'll be back in a few days to share some of ours!

A Reader's Digest Condensed Version of Christmas

Today I'm hitting the Pause button on the hustling and bustling to jot down some quick thoughts on the Season and share some of the highlights so far.

The last couple of Friday nights we've driven out to the Iron Mountain Lodge & Marina to look at the spectacular light display.  This is one of our very favorite family Christmas traditions.  It's a fundraiser for the Make A Wish Foundation and the owners of all the fancy-schmancy houseboats decorate their boats, docks and the marina and local businesses sponsor the decorating of all the Lodge buildings and cottages and pretty much anything else that doesn't move.

Here's a view from the top of the hill leading down to one of the docks:

(I would like to apologize for the quality of the pictures or the lack thereof.  These pics were taken with my iPhone and she doesn't take good pics at night.)

Here's the family walking across the water to the dock through my personal favorite, the tunnel of lights.

That last sentence made me giggle.  I don't mean that my family actually walks on water like Jesus, although they are pretty great if I may say so myself.  There's a floating bridge thing-y but you probably figured that out.

Here's one of the fancy-schmancy houseboats:

(Wes is actually having a better time that it appears in this photo!)

Sometimes they even have a real Santa that hands out presents to the kids.

That sentence just made me giggle too.  Obviously, he's not a real Santa!

I think he's just an elf.

The houseboat-ers also have a table set up to receive donations for Make A Wish and free hot chocolate and candy canes.  One man told us this year that they've raised over $250,000 over the years that they've been doing this.  That's a lot of donations from families just looking at some Christmas lights!

Everyone at the marina is so friendly and of course, there's fun Christmas music.  It just makes my heart full.  Life in a small town is beautiful sometimes.

I also really enjoyed our wonderful Christmas party at church.  Have I mentioned how much we love our church, Fellowship Church?  It was such fun and heart-warming time.  Wes had to miss due to business travel but the girls and I went.  We ate some fabulous Christmas goodies...

(See how I ate some carrot sticks to offset the sugar and fat in the rest of it?!)

We ate, laughed, talked and played board games.  Then we had a beautiful time of worship singing Christmas songs by the light of the twinkling Chrismond tree.  Our four teaching pastors took turns reading the Christmas story.  We shared our favorite Christmas memories.  I left with my heart full again.

We also had our small group Christmas party at our house this year.  I just love our small group!  We have the most precious group of college students!  We ate ourselves sick, played Phase 10 and exchanged ornaments.

Amber, Jen and I made a marathon shopping trip and I completely finished my Christmas shopping.  I don't think I've ever laughed so hard, had so much fun and been so exhausted.  Totally worth it.

My friend Jen and I went to the Kari Jobe/Al Denson Christmas concert.  Do you remember Al Denson?  If you are a child of the 80s you should.  I'm sorry to tell you that Jen and I both thought Al was dead.  We were very happy to see that he is, in fact, quite alive and still sounds exactly like he did when I used to listen to my bootleg cassette of him.  Yes, kids, that was way before CDs.

Kari Jobe.  Oh. My. Word.



I thought it just couldn't get any better than Revelation Song.  And then she sang "O Holy Night."

And I almost came unglued.

I really don't think someone who can sing like that ought to also be so beautiful.  It just doesn't seem fair.

Not that I'm jealous or anything.

Caitlin goes to an after-school kids program on Wednesdays at the local Methodist Church and they had their annual Christmas musical.  Caitlin sang "Angels We Have Heard On High" with two other little girls.

So that's our Christmas season so far in a nutshell.

We've had lots of fun and made lots of memories.  But this year we're also all too aware that life is fragile and fleeting.  So this year I feel a bit like Mary...I'm treasuring up all these things and pondering them in my heart.  Thanks for sharing them with me.

Christmas Tour Of Homes 2009

WELCOME!


I HIGHLY recommend Nester's Garland Tutorial from last year.  Dare I say it might be the most helpful and inspiring decorating blog post on the Internet?!  If I can do it, anyone can!


This year I decided to get an early start and put my cheap Walmart garland (purchased after Christmas for 50% off) on my fireplace mantel and then I thought...wait, what if I made a THANKSGIVING garland?  So, I took a bunch of random fall-ish stuff that I had in my closet and  did this...

And then the day after Thanksgiving I simply pulled out all the fall-ish stuff and added a bit more el cheapo garland on each end and VOILA!  I had the beginnings of my Christmas garland.  Oh, how I heart multi-use items!


So here's the Christmas-y version...

Here's the view from the foyer:

I'm sorry I don't know what to tell you about the golden-ish lighting of my photos.  Let's pretend that I used one of the faincy settings on my camera just to be artsy.


This is the view from the kitchen.  See how cleverly I disguised the fact that I don't have window treatments?! 









And how fun is this garland that I bought last year after Christmas at Hobby Lobby for 66% off?!  It's on my tree.

I love me some Hobby Lobby sales!


And speaking of my tree...

That picture really doesn't do it justice.  Anybody know a good site with a photography tutorial for dummies?


I'm going to end with some pics of my beautiful Nativity that was a gift from my in-laws a couple of years ago.

Thanks so much for stopping by!  I hope you and yours have a Blessed Christmas!